Kili's Journal Keep out! (That means you Fili)
by Crazy Tolkienite
Summary: After the Battle of the Five Armies Dis starts going through her son Kili's things and find his journal. What were Kili's thoughts during the Quest? Did Fili really write in his brothers journal when Kili had told him not to? R & R! Will be a bunch of one shots seen through Kili's Diary (mostly) Taking request on one shot ideas...
1. April 26, 2941, Third Age

A/N: So this was originally made for my comp class. FYI this is really just to be funny some of it I believe Kili would actually write if he had a journal while other parts of it are (like I said) just to be funny. Hope you guys like it and if you want me to continue it message me what you want to happen and I'll do my best. Otherwise this will remain a one shot.

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Dis sighed and smiled as she began to go through her dead and youngest son Kili's things. She found many things, but what surprised her the most his journal. Dis sighed again, wondering if she even dared to read it. She gave in, opened it to the first page and read.

April 26, 2941,The Third Age

Dear Journal,

Well I have arrived at Mr. Boggins house. Uncle Thorin got lost on the way here! Twice! Hahaha… I thought it was rather easy to find my way here, especially with the mark on the door. Uncle Thorin was being majestic (as always) but he actually said I was getting better at my majesticness! (happy face!) Ori has started a sketch of me. He wont show it to me though says it's a surprise. Well, Fili and me's plate throwing lessons have finally paid off! It was fun and you should have seen the look on Bilbo's face when we were done! Hahaha, it was hilarious. Bofur was amazing at it! He must have had many years of practice. Bombur just sat there eating as always. I remember hiding the cookies when he came to visit. Those were the days but then Mama would scold us because "Bombur is company and we are to treat him as such. So no more hiding the cookies!" Eventually, we did stop hiding the cookies. Speaking of cookies, I could do for some of Mama's sugar cookies right now. I wonder if Bilbo has any…. Be right back. No, he doesn't have any. Bombur ate the last of them! (sad face) Bilbo should make some more cookies! Alas, I asked him if he could, but he said that he was much so busy to. (even sadder face) I want some cookies! (angry face) Wow, I make a lot of faces! Fili says I talk in my sleep too. I think he is just messing with me. He does that a lot. Like the time he told me that I don't have a fan club. Well, guess what Fili ,I do! Mama said so. I must get going I have to go take notes on how to be majestic while singing! (because Uncle Thorin has started to sing so… yeah) Write to you later! Haha! Get it? Write to you later not talk to you later? Hahahaha! (laughing uncontrollably face)

Kili

(Note to self work on majestic signature)

Dis laughed. How very like Kili to write something like that in his journal, apparently Fili had been there too. Dis then let out a soft sob and continued to read until she came upon the last entry. It was dated a few days before what was becoming known as the Battle of the Five Armies.

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A/NThis story was originally in publisher form which means that there are some things missing that would make the story better but oh well! Fili wrote in Kili's first entry. The following is what Fili had written in the empty spaces that he could and this is only on the first entry:

_Baggins! Not Boggins! -F_

_Kili its we! Not I! We have arrived. -Fili_

_Uncle Thorin has a majestic signature and so do I and yet you don't? Tsk Tsk …. –F_

_P.S. Fili! KEEP OUT! - It says so on the cover! -K_

A/N: Ill let you guess where Fili wrote them

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November 23, 2941, The Third Age

Dear Journal,

Well we are trapped in Eribor, Smaug is dead and Thorin is mad at Bilbo for giving the Arkenstone to the Elves. That pretty much sums up the week. Oh and...ready for it? I'm going to be in my first battle! YAY! I wonder if I'll do something great and get a name like… Kili the Archer. No, that wont do…. Kili Srongfighter? No. None of them will work! Oh well. So I was reading my first entry in this journal book and I realized that I never told you how Ori's sketch looked. It looks amazing! It's as though your looking at me in black and white. That's how life like it looks. Even Uncle Thorin was impressed. Which is a big deal and means that Ori is really good! I was talking to Balin and he told me that Mama and Uncle Thorin are fifteen years apart in age! Crazy right? And then Mama and Uncle Frerin are nine years apart. But, I already knew that. Gandalf is back. He is staying with the elves and men though. Dain is supposed to be here soon. Uncle Thorin is a little moody, out of impatience. He even snapped at Dwalin! Thank goodness Balin was there otherwise… who knows what would have happened! By the way, Fili I know that you are reading this, so do me a favor: DON'T WRITE IN HERE and KEEP OUT! You know how much a hate it when you read my journal. Please, be the kind brother that you are deep down in side of you, Please? If you don't I'll tell Thorin and you don't want that do you? You got in enough trouble last time. You almost lost the privilege of coming on the quest! Be grateful that I convinced Mama and Thorin to let you come by NOT writing in my journal, Please? Now where was I? Oh ,yes, Thorin being snappy. Anyway, Dwalin was pretty upset and if it weren't for Balin Thorin would have a black eye and possibly a broken bone or two. It might have been the other way around and then I would have laughed and probably gotten in trouble. Then I would not be able to fight in the upcoming battle and that would have be terrible. – One moment… The orcs and goblins are here! I must go prepare for battle don't worry though. I'll tell you how it went. Oh, and if I should die... know this Mama. I love you and miss you an awful lot! See you soon! (I hope)

Killi

Dis started to weep. "Oh my son! I love you and miss you to. All three of you."

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A/N: And there you have it!. I hope you liked it! I love hearing from you guys. So Read & Review!


	2. 2941 (In Mirkwood)

A/N: So... This is short... mostly since I don't have any reviews telling me what to write next... *hint hint* and yes this is going to be a bunch of one shots! :D

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Dear Journal,

Well being stuck in Thranduil's dungeon can make you forget what day it is. The only thing I know is that it is still 2941 And that is what has happened to me, that and I really like this girl..., but that's a story for another time! Anywho, if you don't know where the 'Eleven king' lives then I will tell you. He lives in Mirkwood. You know where all the creepy weird overly large spiders live? Yeah. That's the place. I don't know for the live of me what he sees in this place though... It gives me the creeps! ... ok I'm done with the dots its kind of hard on my patience...

Ugg! I need to write but I can't think of anything to write!

Gee-whiz!

...

I'm kind of tired...

Zzzzzzzz...

Thranduil is a loser!

I hope Bilbo finds a way for us to escape..

Thats it! I'm done!

love,

Kili

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A/N: I know I know! Its boring! Don't burn me PLEASE?! This 'chapter' (if you could call it that) is in honer of Desolation of Smaug. Which I haven't seen yet... D': And yes I know of the Tarelil/Kili pairing and personally I DON'T like that ship. Its not right! Kili is supposed to love me! (Take that Cowgirltori88! :P ) BTW I kinda need a Beta? So if you know a good one will you PM me on how to reach him/her? Thanks! And what was the other thing I was wanting to say...? Oh! Yes. PLEASE! Let me know if there is a one shot that you want me to write? PLEASEEE? Just drop me a review! or PM me! I_ REALLY_ like hearing what you guys have to say! Oh and another thing...**THANK YOU FOR MAKING THIS MY MOST POPULAR STORY EVER! I MEAN THIS STORY HAS HAD 9-SOMETHING VIEWS! HAJSFNKJOSITSDFKLSJDTKJDFH! ITS JUST- I- I LOVE YOU GUYS! YOU ARE STINKIN' A.M.A.Z.I.N.G. LIKE THERE ARE NO WORDS TO DESCRIBE HOW AMAZING YOU ARE! AND THANKS TO ALL WHO FAVORITED/FOLLOWED/READ/REVIEWED ETC!** And Tori (guest who was to lazy to sign in to her FanFic account.. Cowgirltori88!) I know that it isn't very realistic it wasn't made to be I was just having fun with it :D Love you bestie! So yeah. You should know the drill by now but just in case you forgot I'll lay it out for you!

Step 1: Scroll till you see a box that says 'type your review here...'

Step 2: tell me what you thought, any ideas etc.

Step 3: (now this is the tricky part) Press 'Post review as (insert guest name/username)

Step 4: Smile 'cause you have made my day!

~GRLD over and out!~


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